Wyoming Hike

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhuOaUp1Cuk This was my journey from isolation and disconnection, to community and connection. This is my journey to face my biggest fears, and to push myself harder than I have ever done before, and to find the best parts of myself. One day I was scrolling through my Instagram, sending messages and inspirational video clips to my favorite people. When one of my Instagram hiker “friends” sent me a message asking me if I ever wanted to hike the Wind River Range, since I lived in Wyoming. I had to sheepishly admit, I was afraid of hiking in Wyoming because of my PTDS. He then offered to hike it with me, to support me through it. Then I had to admit that he was…through no fault of his own, an old, white, man. I am seriously triggered by old white men. Now being the seasoned and rugged hiker that he was, he said something about facing my fears, and it hit. How could I tell other people about my path to healing, if I could not face my own trauma, my own issues, my own fears. That day I decided that he was right, I had to face my fears.…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Co7pfklQtVQ Part 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtTWFUZgTss Part 2 I have thought a lot about this question, because I am asked this repeatedly. It is complex, but simple answer, because I can. Physically, I feel like have been training all my life for this hike. I started running away into the woods for peace and safety for as long as I can remember. And, I have been walking almost every day of my life, it was my way of coping with life, thinking, re-centering, grounding. I cannot do a lot of things, but I can walk. I can live in the woods. On a more personal level, I hike to heal. I hike for my own repentance, for my own forgiveness. I hike to bring awareness, to speak the truth, to ask forgiveness, and to find peace as last. I hike for my sisters and brothers, those little children, forever in my mind being beaten and broken in every way imaginable. I hike for my daughters, and my nieces and nephews. I have watched them struggle with the darkness that we passed on to them. And I hike for their children. May their children never be touched by this dark past. In the…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqfPcqDk9YI&t=3s I would describe the first pause of my heal hike with one word, frustrating. My early notes kind show this fact… “Accumulated Continental Divide Trail, CDT miles-27 miles-Accumulated miles in Wyoming-44 miles-Accumulated hikes/towns-Otto/Burlington-4 miles, Jeffery City-8 miles, Encampment-2 miles, Bairoil-10 miles, Worland-12 miles, Shell-8 miles 4/24/2023” “First up, Sweet Water Station.  Nope, road closed, no access. Okay, no problem, I will drive to Jeffery City access road. The road not closed officially, but road was too muddy. Fine, I drive as close as I can get, then hike the rest of the way in. I strap on my pack, 4 miles in, 1 mile from the trail, I finally give in and turn back.” “Funny story: trying to hike around the snow drifts and the mud gets old quick. So, off trail again I decide to cut across what I thought was a flat area. I was not paying a great deal of attention, when suddenly, my trekking pole sinks down several feet further in the snow than I think it should have.  I pull out my trekking pole and look down the hole left by it. I am NOT standing on a flat spot with little sage brush sticking up,…